Local Anesthetic

I only have a few days in town between the last set of gigs and the next - ten days, to be exact - so when I'm at home for a short period of time like that, I really don't want to do much of anything, or go anywhere unless it's an absolute necessity. But a few hours ago, Joy and I went to go see an old friend of mine playing in his band here in town. I kinda wish I hadn't gone.

Y'see, the band just wasn't all that good, and I could lay damn near all of the fault at the feet of the drummer. He just wasn't that good, and on top of playing and singing, he was also constantly fiddling with the PA's mixer with his left hand while trying to keep the beat going with his right. The end result was a total lack of cohesion. My old friend is a damn good guitarist, but his guitar was nowhere near loud enough. And it took Joy and I telling him on a break to get their lead singer sounding halfway decent.

All this got me to thinking about Dirty Joe. Ron and John knew exactly when I was going to be back in town, but they've yet to make any sort of contact with me. I know, I'm the bandleader, I should be calling them. But I don't really want to call them. I've known full well that this band has been in a death spiral for months. Roger is gone - just gone. Nobody knows where he is. I guess I'll be reading his obituary soon enough. Ron is dealing with his chemotherapy, and I already know I'll be reading his obituary soon enough. John is just trying to stay above water while being a single father. And while the new (to me, old to them) singer they've presented sounded like he had an idea what to do, Joy wasn't impressed with him. But everything's moot when nobody is communicating. And that is partly my fault, I will admit that to you, dear reader. But I've gotten to the point where I just don't give a damn about playing in a local band.

I mean, I've had plenty of work so far this year. The first significant time off I'll have all year from Steppen Stonz isn't until April, when Cliff has to go in for surgery to install a cardiac defibrillator. And the gaps in our schedule that are further out are being closed down in a hurry. I don't really know if I have time to work a side project any more. And even if I did, after the experience I've had with Dirty Joe, I don't really know if I want to lead a band any more, regardless of its importance to me. After this, I think I would just be too demanding of the musicians I would hire. Too controlling. And since I, like most people, just hate having someone tell me what to do, so why would I inflict myself on someone else?

Oh well. At least I get to get back on the road again here in a few days, and can unburden myself of those kind of issues for a while.